Translating an Old Story to a New One

Anyone who has been reading these Monday Morning Stretches for any length of time has surely gotten the message that LionSpeak believes in the power of creating new stories for ourselves, our businesses, our clients, and our families.  We strongly believe it is within our power to conjure, create, and attract any new story and reality we want. And yet, I find myself telling others my old stories all the time, not the stories or realities I really want but rather I go on and on about the ones I don’t.

Let me give you an example. I’m in the final throes of writing my book which, for two years, I have thought would be about and be entitled, “Courageous Conversations.” But, as luck would have it, that phrase has been trademarked and cannot be used as a book title. The confirmation of this near the final hour of turning in my manuscript to the publisher sent me into a drastic downward spiral.

My old story: I cannot believe this has happened to me at the final hour after all I have put into writing this book. Why didn’t my publisher give me a heads up early in the game to research my title before I spent two years researching, writing, rewriting, and pouring every spare moment into this work? Everyone in my industry knows me in terms of Courageous Conversations so how do I now flip the switch and call it something different? What happens to the brand I’ve claimed and developed for myself over a decade of work? Now, I have to go back and rework this entire book, and I’ll never make my final deadline. I never should have invested this much time, money, and energy into a project like this. Who did I think I was to believe that I could actually author a book worth reading?

I could go on, but I’ll spare you the pain. You get the idea.

Worse than the story itself, I have repeated this story to many, many people and to myself multiple times, each time carving it deeper and deeper into my brain—my thoughts, beliefs, assumptions, and truths. And the truth is, I’ve made it all up—every bit of it.

The only actual facts are that my presumed book title has been trademarked and can’t be used. Everything else is the story I have created as an interpretation of those facts. And that story made me miserable, depressed, insecure, and feeling hopeless in relation to my upcoming book.

And then, in a moment of clarity, I remembered the most important story I will ever write is not my book. The most important story I will ever author is the one that is MY LIFE. And just like that, I wrote a new one in my head, a refreshed version of the facts. And instantly, I felt better. And instantly, I had some great new ideas. And instantly, I was sleeping like a baby and waking up excited to get back to writing. So, why oh why do I keep forgetting how this works?

Habit. We’re so used to quickly interpreting the facts that we don’t even know we’re doing it, and before we know what’s happening our thoughts are a train racing down the tracks toward Doomsville. It doesn’t have to be this way if we first care about the way we feel and about feeling better and then intercept the old story, translating it into a new story before it comes out of our mouth or takes up residence in our brain.

Here’s what I mean:

Old Story: I cannot believe this has happened to me at the final hour after all I have put into writing this book. 

Translation: Maybe there is a hidden gift in considering another title and new name for my process? Haven’t I actually had the thought before that Courageous Conversations could be a very overused term? Couldn’t this force me to find something proprietary to me and my process that is unforgettable to those who hear it. I mean don’t you hear, “Start with Why” and think: Simon Sinek? Don’t you hear “The 5-Second Rule” and think: Mel Robbins? What’s that phrase for me?  This happening BEFORE the book has been submitted might actually be a blessing.  This is great. This is just what I needed to really find the powerful phrase that kicks this book up to the next level. I know I’ll find it. I always have before when I’ve searched for new and inspired ideas. Wasn’t that what happened when I found “The Lioness Principle”? Wasn’t that exactly what happened when I landed on “LionSpeak”? I can do this. Of course I can do this. I’m going to enjoy doing this.  I’m actually glad this happened. It’s going to make the final product something I’m even more proud of and love even more and that serves me much better over time. 

It’s so interesting to me how my energy rises, my body physically relaxes, and my brain automatically shows me evidence of what I’m looking for when I start translating my story. By telling and retelling the old story, we are beating the drum of what has been. By telling and retelling the new story, we are beating the drum of what is becoming. This turns the regurgitation of the old into a creation of the new.

One of my favorite quotes is from Dr. Sue Morter who said, “Life is hard…until it’s not.” Life is hard until we decide that it isn’t, until we start to translate the story of “hard” into the alternatively true story of “ease” or “good” or “useful” or “powerful” or “magical.” Fill in your own adjective.

This week, when you find that you are living out a hard story, experiment with translating it to a different, alternatively true story that is what you want it to be and the way you want it to happen. Produce the result you want instead of the one you don’t and then lean into the new, better reality.

“The stories we tell literally make the world.”

~ Chris Cleave