The Fuel of Frustration

Would it surprise you if I said that I love frustration? Oh, not for me. I hate it when I’m frustrated, yet I actually love it when a client or team member tells me they’re frustrated because frustration can be one of the single greatest motivators for action. When we feel frustrated, it means that we care strongly about something being different. The question is: do we care enough to actually do something about it?

Feeling frustrated creates an energy that can be used to help things get better, but we must channel that energy and create momentum toward finding a solution, and that takes courage.

What are you feeling frustrated about? Do you really want it to be different? If so, here a few ideas to get you motivated into action today:

  • Name and bless the frustration. Literally write it down. Then make a list of what the frustration shows that you care about. For example:
    • I’m frustrated that people show up to a team meeting and don’t participate or engage.
    • That must mean that I really care about meetings being worthwhile, that I value the opinions of my teammates, and that I want to find a way to create a team meeting environment that my people really appreciate and look forward to.
  • Determine if there is an underlying issue. For example:
    • My frustration could be based on the underlying issue of team disengagement and my team feeling like their ideas are not valued, or maybe even that they as people are not valued.
  • Determine how acute it is. On a scale of 1-10, with 10 being most frustrating, rate the acuity of the situation for you. This will help you keep it in perspective and decide how quickly you should act. For example:
    • This frustration is a 7 for me.
  • Ask yourself what you really want. It’s easy to focus on what we don’t want but often a little harder to articulate and focus on what we do want. For example:
    • I want my team to be excited and positive about the meeting.
    • I want them to come prepared and willing to participate and contribute.
    • I want them to care about how the practice is performing and what they can do to help it be successful.
    • I want us all to look forward to our meetings and leave feeling like we’ve accomplished a lot, that the meetings were positive and even fun, and that we are continuing to build an amazing practice and fantastic team.
  • Create a list of action ideas. Determine what it will take to bring the acuity level down for you, even just one or two points. If you don’t have any ideas, speak with a colleague, friend, co-worker, or coach. For example:
    • Is there a course or workshop I can take on how to improve team meetings?
    • What are other practices doing that we’re not doing?
    • I could ask some of the team privately for their suggestions.
    • I could poll the team anonymously about what would make them better.
  • Commit to taking at least one small step. For example:
    • This week, I will go to a few of my online communities and post a question to find some training resources.
    • I will also craft a questionnaire for the team to answer on a Google form.

Frustration can likely never be eliminated, and we wouldn’t want it to be. It’s like the gasoline in a tank that fuels the combustion which in turn makes the vehicle move forward. It is what helps you grow and stretch beyond your comfort zone.

Start today. Name that thing that is frustrating you, bless it, ideate about it, and let’s use it as fuel to change your business and/or your life.

You can do it!

“Success is not built on success. It’s built on failure. It’s built on frustration. Sometimes it’s built on catastrophe.”

~ Sumner Redstone

Comments

  1. Love this, Katherine! You are so right. Naming it and listing what it shows we care about puts it in perspective and gets us “unstuck”. Awesome step by step for resolution. I see myself using this in my everyday life moving forward. Thank you!!!

    1. Jan, the process has been very helpful for me, both personally and professionally. Glad you liked it and I hope it keeps you unstuck and moving forward!

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