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Congruency

If I ask Tom, “Is anything wrong?” and he smiles, connects with me, and says, “Nothing’s wrong,”… I generally believe him. However, if I ask him, “What’s wrong, honey?” and his response is a mumbled, “Nothing,” accompanied by a sour tone, crossed arms, and a frowning face… I’m likely not to believe him. We hardly ever believe someone when their …

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What Are Your Emotions Telling You?

There is a simple success formula originally authored by Jack Canfield, E+R=O.  Emotions + Response = Outcome. If you’re liking your current outcomes with your goals, people, or overall business, then your emotions are likely producing the right responses. If there are areas where you are not getting the outcomes you want, your emotions may be telling you something. The …

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Freedom

We’ve just celebrated our national 4th of July holiday, one of my favorites.  It’s the day we dedicate to remembering what it means and costs to be free.  I work hard at never taking for granted that I live in a nation that allows me to pursue my dreams, live where I want, worship as I chose, and always have …

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Stop Being the Nice Guy

The most common definitions of the word “nice” are agreeable and enjoyable. But the word “kind” is most often defined as loving, caring, generous, benevolent. And that’s exactly how it is for me. I experience people who are nice as very pleasant, well-mannered, and I usually enjoy being in their company. But kindness feels somehow different, like a value that …

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Feedback for the Future

My friend and colleague, Dino Watt, recently wrote an excellent blog about the difference between feedback and criticism. In it, he mentioned that feedback focuses on outcomes and the future, builds strengths, inspires change, and communicates that the future looks bright. Criticism, on the other hand, focuses on what we don’t want rather than what we do want. It harps …

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Hard Teachers

For almost 25 years, my husband Tom was a second-generation, 5th-grade schoolteacher in a challenging, low socio-economic area where, for the majority of students, English is a second language. At the beginning of the year, most children came to him reading at or below a 3rd-grade level and came from parents without an education themselves. Adding to the challenge was …

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Why Don’t They “Just Do It”?

I spend a lot of time coaching owners, managers, trainers, and frontline professionals on how to positively handle people who aren’t living up to expectations. It can be so frustrating when people don’t do what we want them to do, what we need them to do, what we expect them to do. Most of our frustration comes from a lack of …

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Music Monday: The Happiness You Deserve

As Tom and I happily celebrated our wedding anniversary, I loved re-reading this Stretch from 6 years ago (man, times flies, doesn’t it?) and thought you might too. The lessons are as powerful for me now as they were then. As you celebrate Memorial Day and kick off your summer, I hope you remember that you deserve the best life, and it’s …

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You Asked For It!

In my work with healthcare and service-industry professionals, I’m often asked for my advice on the concept of “asking for referrals” to build your business. My answer? Sometimes I like it and sometimes… I most definitely don’t. As a customer myself, I’ve been asked for referrals and it felt natural, sincere, and I was inclined to try to spread the word on …

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Collective Intelligence

“When two minds are coordinated in the spirit of harmony, the mastermind is evolved.” This is a quote from the short video of Team Yaha’s facilitation of a team exercise that we have used at LionSpeak which we called Steering the Pen. They contend that the mastermind, or collective intelligence, is more powerful and productive than individual minds working independently. The …