I recently heard someone say that how people act demonstrates whether they are receiving love or putting out a call for love. When I consider this in terms of behavior and communication, I think it just might be spot on.
Think about the last time you experienced someone “acting out”— a teenager, a spouse, an audience member, a team member, or even a stranger. Would it change your perspective if you knew that, at the core of their message, underneath it all, the person was really searching and reaching out for acceptance and love?
The need to be seen, heard, valued, understood, and loved is a driving, primal force in all of us. Many people have not developed deep self-awareness, self-control, or emotional regulation techniques. They lash out, act out, or yell out, and what they are really seeking is for someone to hear them and acknowledge them.
There are certainly exceptions to this, but I believe, for those of us who seek to bring more peace, cooperation, and understanding into the world and to build bridges between the divides, it’s an idea worth contemplating.
How could we show more love, acceptance, and patience with others? How could we extend more grace and forgiveness to those who may be doing the best they know how at the moment and trust that when they know better, they will likely do better, just like we have and are.
This week, try to see the behaviors of others through a new lens—the lens of love. See if it softens or changes the view.
“Set the example. Treat everyone with kindness and respect, even those who are rude to you – not because they are nice, but because you are.”
~ Paresh Rawal
Comments
I see this with my pediatric dental patients all the time. It is easy for me to be patient with the kids, but I still struggle to bring my full empathetic self to parents who refuse our advice when their kids are suffering. I will work to bring more love to those conversations in the attempt to help those parents be better for their kids!
Ahhh, Kirstina. That is a wonderful application of this principle. Thank you for sharing and keep doing the amazingly important work you’re doing for all those kiddos and their families.